19 Dec 2015...

I dislike idleness,like this current moment,  like a river, abruptly being stopped, dammed, damned, it makes me think,about life, i don't like that. Am trying to understand what's happening, these things around me, I'm trying to understand this longing, this immense incompleteness, it beats with these heart beats, this echoing the thumping,  every passing moment, it is monstrously trying to swallow me and I'm letting it, but it wont, no matter how much i entice it, reveal its true nature.   I'm incomplete in my entirety. ....

Next day morning...

My mind wrote a monologue.. Must have been 10 pages long..i won't ofcourse type that..

When i got down at the station..these tides brought me down, no matter how much i resist, the temptation to wallow down in oceans of this nostalgic waste, broke me down and i saw the little that is left of me hit the ocean floor with a thud..

.....